Toby Keith: An Assessment

Crystle (spelled as she spelled it) left a comment that I absolutely must mock. Here's her comment, left on the "Toby Keith, Country-Ass Theologian, Redux" post, in its entirety:

Toby keith is THE best country singer! Dont bomb on toby. Toby is a good romodel. Thank god we have patriotic people like him. atleast he stands up for what he believes in. He is a true american and for that, i give him a ll the credit in the world. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK TOBY!

Dear Crystle,

Toby isn't even close to the best country singer, despite what the hordes of mullet-sporting, tooth-sucking, redneck vermin say about him. His voice is average at best, and tends to blend in with hundreds of other country-ish voices that I've heard on country radio for the past forty years. He lacks the distinctiveness of a Dwight Yokam, the creativity of a Lyle Lovett, the smooth, country grace of a George Strait, or the rebel lifestyle of a Hank, Jr., or Waylon Jennings. He's just plain 'ol Toby, an "artist" who labored in insignificance until he glorified the American obsession with narcissism. His songs "Let's Talk About Me" and "How do You Like Me Now" struck a chord in low-brow America by appealing to nascent or full-orbed narcissism amongst the masses who mollified the boredom that defined their lives by drinking long-necks.

He parlayed his success with the ignorant masses into super stardom by pandering to the worst aspects of American culture, especially in his songs about the current conflict in Iraq. By playing on the ignorance of the average American, he conflated terrorism with Iraq and appealed to thoughtless patriotism and xenophobia, not to mention overt racism. He did all this while proclaiming that "Jesus is my Lord and Savior."

I'm not sure what a romodel is, but it sounds very country. I guess he's a role model if you want your child to turn out like Joe Dirt. I'm pretty sure God has nothing to do with patriotic people like him. They're the same ones who think we're fighting a war on terror in Iraq and unswervingly support W despite all the evidence that indicates he made a terrible mistake. I'm not sure what he believes in, other than endorsements from Ford. He claims to be a Christian and then encourages the worst sorts of violence, ignorance, and racism. Sure glad he stands up for those things, Crystle. Where would the world be without him? Give him all the credit in the world for what? Since when do we reward people for acting like ignorant rednecks? Sadly, his ability to make a buck seems to indicate he's not an idiot. This probably means he actually believes all this crap he sings about. When country fans embrace Toby, it's a sure indicator that taste in country music is at an all-time low. Thanks for stopping by, Crystle.

Comments

[Streak]

I think a "romodel" is one of those vacuums that works by itself, right?

[Jennifer]

Face it, good country music is not made for country music fans. Lyle Lovett is my romodel.

[brooke]

greg, as usual, you have no idea what a good romodel is...

[marty]

Hm. I think it's a contraction of "roach motel." I'm not sure though. I should ask my mendor. He usually gives good advice.

[Brandon]

Greg, will you be my romodel?

[Pamela]

I am really dissapointed in Toby Keith. I loved his earliest songs because he was the good guy that we thought he was. The music was good but now every new song he comes up with is not good at all. There all about drinking, having affairs, and things about the war that he really shouldn't be singing about. He is making everyone think that he is racist and that isn't good at all. I know we need to be patriotic and I love this country very much but knocking down other countries isn't a cool thing to do. Remember we are mad at the terrorists and the people who support it not the innocent.