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August 21, 2010



Paul used the word 'shit' (scubula) when he wrote "I count all things as loss...." It's always politely translated to "loss" because they're pussies.


P.S. I used to live in Enid.

Slim Wirth

When I was a pre-school little lad, I would ride my little bike around the neighborhood with my little necktie tied squarely around my neck and my little bible securing resting in the arms of the basket on the front of my bicycle along with my little communion set. I would pass judgment on all I surveyed and I found it all without redemption in the eyes of God for whom my eyes were His able and capable servants.

The biggest problem that God and I had in my neighborhood was a Catholic family who lived across the alley with a very large brood of highly heathenistic male children who ran unsupervised and unwashed around their yard and the adjoining vacant lot. These heathen didn't even wear shirts much less neckties and they reminded me of the band of monkeys in the zoo. One day I parked out in the street and surveyed this horror as they began their normal discourse by strutting around and cursing like little sailors as they mocked me and the God I served. As we were in the yule season, I tried to save them by pointing out that they couldn't possibly hope for a visit from St. Nicholas and with that, they began to howl, swing from the trees and throw what must have undoubtedly been their own feces - although I'm not completely sure on that last point. In my Christlike demeanor, I defended the way and the truth and the life of Saint Claus, but the more I preached, the more the monkeys cursed and vain-fully strutted around their "cage".

Proud of the courage of my missionary appeal and conviction, I went home and reported to my sainted mother the latest apostasy of the "Catholics". My mother paused and then said, "Well, sweetie, there is no Santa Claus".

Well, I'll just be goddamned. Not only were those goddamned Catholics completely right, they had made a total fucking jackass out of me. That day, I took off my necktie and my little white shirt and spent the rest of the summer strutting around like a little sailor with my new friends. The next Sunday, I went to Sunday school, and the teacher started telling a story about how Jesus feed five thousand with two fish and five loaves. On that Sunday, I proudly and loudly proclaimed to the teacher, "That's bullshit, and you know it." My mother washed my mouth out with soap that Sunday afternoon, but I didn't care, I had been set free and when I told my friends across the alley about it, a couple of them were a little hesitant about where the line was drawn and I howled like a little monkey.

Jessica Campbell

well put. this has been a huge beef of mine since freshman year of college. Constantly frustrated that I could get fined $25 / curse word yet those who spread untrue rumors or even true rumors around the school got put on "who's who" and elected as homecoming queen.

ps. I got a pink slip in 1st grade for calling a kid a son of a bitch. I felt it was justified b/c he had stomped on a mother craw-dad and its babies. Neither the girls who told on me, the teacher who gave me the pink slip, nor my mother who washed my mouth out with soap for a week agreed. I still think I was right. And it just goes to show you how valuable corporal punishment is.

Mike McVey

"Year one was Dallas. Year two, the Bengals."

One small correction. Hard Knocks is in its seventh season and fourth consecutive since 2007.

Greg Horton

Mike, should have been clearer. It's only the third season I've watched

Sent from my iPhone


I'm right there with ya, brother...my dad -was- the football coach! Funny thing is, our girls basketball coach (who also assisted with football along side my dad) did not swear at us. In fact, during my senior year, in the midst of an exceptionally rough basketball game, I let out a goddammit that the ref heard and then promptly told my coach, who then benched me immediately and took away my starting position for the rest of the season!


Cursing is part of the natural evolution of language, an organic and necessary extension of the advanced communication that our species enjoys. Curse words/salty language/profanities are a necessary part of any dialect and to deny them a place in our vocabulary is to deny ourselves a rich history of linguistic evolution.

If you want to talk about language that's an abomination to every tongue that's ever uttered a syllable, let's talk about this Christianese bullshit. Broken metaphors; gauzy, ethereal, non-specific terminology; and an almost complete reliance upon nonsensical absurdity. I just pulled up one email from a main offender I know and see phrases like "reloading our spiritual fuel," "outpouring of our discipleship," "deeply soaked in the Word of God" (I won't even comment on the strange fascination with fluid-based analogies). Now, that's some fucking bad language.


also, it seems that i have this random piece of trivia stuck in my head...that the work fuck is actually an acronym used back in the day of locking people in stocks for having sex out of wedlock, and they'd paint the letters of their 'crime' on the stocks: For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge. or i might have just made that up?

dr dobson

Aside from that being also the name of a kick-ass Van Halen album, I've also heard that the acronym represents the phrase, "fornication under consent of the King" due to the fact that the crown attempted to tax prostitution way back when. I haven't wasted my time in England verifying this, however.

I just had a great t-shirt idea: Perhaps we could start a list of such acronyms, print them on a t-shirt, sell them to fund something, say, a DVD about it. We could simply give the DVDs away--it would be a huge hit and lead, undoubtedly, to the demise of fucking.

Did I just combine the topics of recent posts? I think I did . . .


Oxford English Dictionary is agnostic on the etymology of "fuck," but my favorite is this citation from 1536:
Ay fukkand lyke ane furious Fornicatour.

dr dobson

I heard somewhere that Friends University of Central Kansas has a great student relations department.


Wikipedia offers: Some of these urban legends are that the word fuck came from Irish law. If a couple were caught committing adultery, they would be punished "For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge In the Nude", with "FUCKIN" written on the stocks above them to denote the crime. Another theory is that of a royal permission. During the Black Death in the Middle Ages, towns were trying to control populations and their interactions. Since uncontaminated resources were scarce, many towns required permission to have children. Hence, the legend goes, that couples that were having children were required to first obtain royal permission (usually from a local magistrate or lord) and then place a sign somewhere visible from the road in their home that said "Fornicating Under Consent of King", which was later shortened to "FUCK". This story is hard to document but has persisted in oral and literary traditions for many years; however, it has been demonstrated to be an urban legend.

fuckin urban legends...:)

dr dobson

. . . yes, one must be suspicious of those nasty, oral traditions . . .

Someone stop me, please.

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